Trying to be Macho, or Independent, can Lead to Trouble

I wanted to remind you about the exciting new book promotion that is going on.  Brandilyn Collin’s book, Eyes of Elisha, is now the book that will be given away in a free drawing. Brandilyn is one of the top Christian mystery, and suspense writers in the business. Brandilyn even graciously autographed the book.

To have a chance to win this book got to the right side bar, and click on the icon that talks about subscribing to my free newsletter. When you subscribe you are also in all future drawing for free books.

You will also see that when you subscribe you will be able to download a free eBook called,  The Top 25 Ways to Survive in a Troubled World.

So you get a free newsletter with excerpts from my book, Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World. You can download a free eBook, and you have many chances to win top selling books, with autographs in them.

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Trying to Make it Without God

 

It is very interesting to me how we think they can go through their daily routines, and survive without the help of God. People have gotten to a place where they do not want to depend on anyone else during their crises, or troubled times.

Why is it that someone can look you in the eye and tell you, “I can make it on my own?” You do not need to worry about me. Is it some kind of macho thing with men, and a worry of losing control for women and men?

I have learned that it is impossible to do my work unless I use the power of Jesus. I fear the unknown. I often have to face physical challenges. I see doors closing. I am not sure what I am suppose to do next in my life. Who should I turn to?

It is now easy for me to answer that question. I turn ALL of my concerns over the Jesus. He is walking with me down my path of life. He looks ahead and clears things for me. He helps me make decisions on hard issues. He is there when I have a physical need. He gives me directions when I am at a crossroad.

It is so easy to get complacent, and think we are tough, and reseleant. The truth is we will walk into the muck and mire if we do not have Jesus there to tell us which ways to go and what things to do.

If you are floundering, and in a spot where you have no where to turn to. talk to Jesus. If you haven’t accepted Him as your persoanl Savior, do it right now.

All you have to do is say this short prayer: “Lord, forgive me for any sins that may keep me from your love. I know I have not been as good a person as you would like for me to be. Thank you for dying for me on the cross, and I accept you as my personal Savior. In your Holy name, Amen.”

It is that easy. BUT it is not that easy from this moment on if you accepted Jesus into your heart. Statan is one very upset dude right now. He had you under his skin and he wants you back. You will face many tough trials and temptations. Find a friend that can be your earthly guardian angel. Call them when you are tempted. Call them several times  a day if you have to.

Things that may cause you to falter are:

anxiety, fear, self doubt, depression, addicatons, hoplessness, low self esteem, and many more that I know you can think of that I have not mentioned. Turn every one of them over to Jesus. He will carry you the rest of the way.

If you have any commets, please feel free to let me know.

 

Doug

 

Don’t Get Rid of Your Spouse. They are not the Enemy!

 Wait a minute!

Before today’s post I want to announce that the drawing for the book,  Moments This Good: The Softer Side of Alzheimer’s, by Bonnie Nester, has been completed. The winner will be notified.

Now I have exciting news:

I was sent an autographed book written by THE Brandilyn Collins, called, Eyes of  Elisha. It is one of her previous books she has written, but it is brand new.

I am very pumped about being able to give one of you this book by the arguably # 1  Christian fiction mystery writing author on the planet.

All you have to do to have a chance to win in the drawing is go to the right side bar and find the icon that talks about signing up for my free newsletter. While you are there you will notice you will alos get a free eBook for signing up as well.

So…… a free newsletter-free eBook, and a chance to win a free book written by one of the top selling authors in Christian fiction.

Can’t go wrong. You have nothing to lose and a great deal to gain.

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Not so Fast! Your Support is Right in Your House!

 

The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife,

and likewise, the wife to her husband.

1 Corinthians 7:3

 

In our daily lives we go about trying to just make it through the day. And we spend much of our time worrying about tomorrow. We do not know where to turn for comfort.

I learned through my own troubled times that I have one place I can always turn besides prayer and meditating on God. It is someplace (someone) right in my home. My wife. I’ve learned that a spouse should be your special place of refuge.

And I’ve learned that my wife Charlotte is not the enemy. There were times when I wondered about this, and struck back. Through counseling, I realized that she is my strength—and my friend. In the past I always tried to blame her for many of my problems. If I was depressed, it was her fault. If I failed at something, it was her fault.

Our personal counselor made us think and really look at each other. Each of us had to decide if the other really was on our side. Or was my spouse the enemy? This, of course, was an easy choice. Charlotte was not the enemy. She wants the best for me, and I want the best for her. So why do we spend so much time blaming our spouses for our problems?

They are the ones we should be going to for help with our problems. If there is an unresolved issue that has come between the two of you, sitting in silence only fuels the problem.

We need to consider the feelings of our spouses, and stop putting ourselves ahead of them. We need to clean up our inner feelings before we can attempt to help others. If we do this and really try to stick with that formula, the regret we feel should be because we haven’t done what we feel we should have done to uplift our spouses.

Think of your spouse as your sounding board, your place of refuge. You need to consider your spouse a place for you to share hurt, and a place where you can feel free to “unload,” without judgment or punishment.

Talk to your spouse and let him or her know that you do not think of them as your enemy, and also let them know that you are on their side and want to help them in any way as they go through their daily lives.

Your heavenly Father is, of course, not your enemy. Neither is your spouse, who is your earthly companion that you should always feel free to share your hurts with—just like you would with God.

 

Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives,

and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you

of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

1 Peter 3:7

 

However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself,

and the wife must respect her husband.

Ephesians 5:33

 

Further adventures

Sit down and list the good things you know about your spouse. Now write the things that you consider bad things. Look at each of them, and then throw the bad things in the garbage. Keep the good things and concentrate on them. There is a saying, “Write your hurts in the sand and your happiness in cement.” This way your hurts will wash away, and you can always see your happiness. This is the step toward a happier marriage. Don’t keep score of the bad feelings. Only count the good.

 

Something to ponder

Wouldn’t it be funny if Adam said to Eve, “Watch it; I have plenty of ribs where you came from”?

(Excerpt from: Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World. Chapter 11)

 

Doug

Death Has no Calendar. It comes in the Night When you Least Expect it

                            Death Where is Your Sting? 

 

This last Monday I went to a BSF Bible study. BSF stands for Bible Study Fellowship. We were in a group of men that discuss the previous week’s lesson. At the end of our discussion one of the members said, “My friend who has been coming here with me each week has died.” The group was stunned. The man seemed to be in good health. It was very sudden. 

This incident reminded me of one of the chapters from my book, Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World. This is chapter 6.

I hope that you will find some comfort from this post:

 

Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?

The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law.

1 Corinthians 15:55–56

 

As believers, we have the comfort of knowing we have eternal life. According to Romans 5:12, death comes to all of us. We have to go through the process that all living things must go through. However, we can be reassured that we will have new bodies, and be in heaven with God.

It is also hard to lose loved ones and friends. God doesn’t explain to us why He takes some people earlier than others. It is not for us to decide who should stay. God chooses and we should thank Him for each day we have with our loved ones.

In May of 2001 my father was on his deathbed, dying from a stroke. On this day, I had a close encounter with God. I wanted to make sure that he was right with the Lord. I decided that I was going to talk to him when I was with him at the hospital. I went out into the hall to gather myself and pray.

I looked to my right. Coming down the hall was the pastor from the church I had been attending. He was coming to visit another member of the church. I stopped him and said I needed him to come in and talk to my father. The pastor did come in and talk to my father, and we were sure then that he had the Lord in his heart. I was overjoyed that the Lord had sent the pastor just at the time I was getting up the courage to talk to my father.

He just happened to be coming to the hospital? He just happened to be on the right floor? He just happened to be in the right wing, and he just happened to be coming down the hall when I went out into the hall? I don’t think so!! God sent my pastor on a mission to talk to my father that morning. My father died two days later.

It is all right to grieve for your loved ones and friends, but if you know they are Christians, you have tremendous comfort. You know you will see them again some day.  

If they are not a Christian, take time to share with them the love of God. You could also have the hospital chaplain talk to them, or have your church’s pastor talk to them. You may even go out into the hall, and have a pastor coming toward you to talk to them!

I also have had the privilege of having many friends that were very dear to me. They each made an impact in my life. In just the last few years, I’ve had to say good-bye to several of them. Physical death took them from us, but spiritually they live on. I am only sharing this to let you know that I will be able to see each of them when it is my turn to walk the walk.

Arlene Corn was probably the best Detroit Tiger fan in the whole world. She lived in our cul-de-sac. She also was also a wonderful Christian. When she went to be with the Lord we all sang “Take Me out to the Ball Game” at her packed memorial service. There was not a dry eye at the service. She was an instant friend in the neighborhood. You felt you knew her from day one. Cancer took her from us.

My neighbor, who lived across the street, was one of the toughest women I have ever met. She called a spade a spade, and wouldn’t hesitate to let you know if you needed to be corrected. When someone mentioned that a friend had “passed away,” she scolded, “They didn’t pass away; they died!” She did pass away, and she will be greatly missed by all of her neighbors. She loved dogs, and the neighborhood dogs seemed to have known it. They lined up at her home for treats. Cancer took her from us.

A teacher friend of mine was a single parent of two sons that she loved very much. She also loved teaching kindergarten children, and they loved her. My wife and I took her for many of her chemotherapy sessions because her sons needed to be in school. She wanted to look special for everyone, so she wore a wig and made sure she was dressed well for her doctor visits. She remained positive to the very end. She passed away in her sleep. Cancer took her from us.

Another friend of ours was very tough woman. She could bite the head off a pit bull, but she was a person who spread her love as far as she could reach. She loved the “boys” who came to visit her. They were high school kids who needed someone to talk to. She had them over almost every night. They would sit around and talk to her and her husband. It was a place for them to unload.

She unloaded on my wife and her husband one time at a doctor’s appointment they had gone to with her. They started to break down at something the doctor said. “Quit being wimps!” she scolded. She didn’t want anyone feeling sorry for her. At her memorial service no one was allowed to say anything sad about her. Cancer took her from us.

Another teacher friend was a very proud woman. She refused to dwell on her illness. She always felt she was going to beat cancer. She was a woman that fought for the right to have an assisted suicide in Oregon, the first state to allow it. She felt that we all should be able to die with dignity. She even spoke before Congress on the issue. She passed away before she was able to have assistance. Cancer took her from us.

Howard Girod and I met about six years ago when we moved next door to him and his wife. He was the kind of person you were not sure you would be friends with. He once jokingly called me the village idiot. But as I got to know him, I found out that he was the most loving man I had met in a long time.

I almost fell off a ladder he was holding for me, and he scolded me like I was his son. “Be careful!” he shouted. Another time just before his death, when he was very weak, he whispered to me from his hospital bed, “If I could start over again … I wouldn’t!”

His favorite line at the end was, “God bless you.” That meant so much to me, especially since he had once called me the village idiot. Howard was a strong Christian who said a strong word once in awhile, but his love for you made you know that he was going to have a seat close to God when he passed. Leukemia took him from us.

God took all these people the same way. They all died from some form of cancer, except my father who died from a stroke. There is not an answer why they had to leave us so soon, but God has His reasons. I thank Him for sharing these people with me for the time we had together. A father or a friend is a precious person that you should cherish each day you have them. You never know when they will not be with you anymore.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil, for you are with me.

Psalm 23:4

 

I tell you the truth, if anyone keeps my word, he will never see death.

John 8:51

 

Further adventures

You never know when your signs of hope will be. I have had many that I know of, but I probably had many more I didn’t know about. Try to keep track of when you have signs of hope and let me know about them by sending your story to me.

 

S0mething to ponder

Isn’t it funny that our children can’t read the Bible in school, but they can in prison?

(This is an excerpt from: Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World) Chapter 6