Tag: hopelessness

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Do You Live on the Corner of Boredom and Dead End?

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We have been sharing excerpts from the book, “Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World.” This book is perfect for an Easter present, and Easter is only about two weeks away.

There is a special sale going on right now, so click on the “Bookstore,” tab above to check it out.

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The excerpt today talks about how easy it is to be a “back slider,” once we become Christians. It helps us to understand what we need to do to be strong.

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Chapter 53

 

Done There; Been That

 

If I take part in the meal with thankfulness, why am I denounced because of something I thank God for? So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.

1 Corinthians 10:30–31

 

The first week of my weight-loss program was wonderful—I lost 13 pounds in one week! (That shows you how overweight I was.) I have gone on to lose a total of 58 pounds.

It was amazing what losing 58 pounds can do. I felt so much better, had more energy and began to sleep better. I even noticed that I had a better attitude. Must be something to this losing weight stuff, don’t you think?

I saw a bumper sticker that says, “Three square meals makes one round.” Or there’s the one that says, “He who stuffeth, fluffeth.” I know the truth of those sayings and have struggled with weight for many years. I am sure none of you have. (Oh! You have?)

Have you ever said on January 1st, “This is the year I’m going to lose weight and keep it off”? You commit to going down to the club at least three times a week to work out. You cut down on your food intake and watch your eating habits, and for a few weeks things go great. Statistics say that the health clubs are the busiest during the month of January, but everyone drops out of sight by March.

Why are we so excited when we start a diet, and then fall down a month or so later?

Do you live on the corner of Boredom and Dead End? Do your days seem like weeks when things don’t go well? Does the end of the money come before the end of the bills and the end of the month?

These are things that can tear at our initial excitement about dieting? Seem silly? Not according to many experts. Depression, illness, failure, and other negative issues can stop us in our tracks, driving us to our comfort zone. And for many of us our comfort zone involves food. We even have a category called “comfort foods”: pudding, mashed potatoes, macaroni and cheese—things that are smooth and soft and remind us of the comfort of childhood.

That is the way it is for new, born-again Christians. They feel wonderful at first, and everything goes well for a month. Then they start forgetting where they put their Bible. They mean to study the Bible every day, but they oversleep most days. Church seems to get in the way of the big game on TV.

All the while, the same old feelings they had before they became a Christian start coming back. They are easily angered when someone is late or not doing their part of the work. Their children drive them crazy, so they retreat to a spot in front of the TV or get engrossed in their favorite magazine.

Think that none of these seems sinful enough to draw us away from God? “Give Satan an inch and he will make it a mile.” (Hey! Another great bumper sticker!) Here are a couple more good ones:

One snowflake grows into an avalanche.

Every little molehill can grow intoMt.Everest.

Don’t let the small things fool you.

Satan is very clever. He will not tempt us to do things that seem out of place—at first. Instead, he likes to chip away at our heart, and slowly get us back into his realm.

We need to go on a spiritual diet! We need to lose all those weighty problems like depression, doubt, anger and failure that cause us to be exhausted even when we see the slightest sign of hope. We need the proper food to help us grow. Here’s a good diet to follow:

1 Bible

½ hour of prayer in the morning followed by ½ hour of studying God’s Word

Constant prayer throughout the day

A Bible or a Christian book to read after the evening meal

More prayer at bedtime

Stir these ingredients into your life every day for the rest of your life, and you will see and feel the difference. You will be a clean serene fighting machine—one that Satan will not be able to cope with.

The negative pounds will start coming off. You will feel stronger, have more energy, sleep better at night, and have a much better attitude. All the benefits of what you eat spiritually will make a difference as you turn to God and let Him be in your life. 

I have been on so many different diets I can’t even remember the names of some of them. There was the “Eat bananas all day” diet, but I started making strange noises, and jumping up and down. But my swinging on the chandelier did it forCharlotte.

One diet promised I could become a slender “animal” by eating only meats and poultry. I tried that for awhile, and the pounds did come off, but then whenever I looked at a live chicken or a cow, I felt tremendous guilt because I was eating their brothers and sisters!

A vegetarian diet led to other problems for me—one of them being too much time in the bathroom. I had better ways to spend my day!

This went on until I shifted to Weight Watchers. I could eat anything I wanted as long as I stayed within my point totals for the day.

There are so many ways (formulas, diets) we’ve devised to follow God that it’s no wonder so many of us go off spiritual diets.

I did some church-hopping in my earlier days in my search for the perfect church. I didn’t find one. I learned that there are pluses and minuses in every church.

That leads me to comment on the bumper sticker at the start of this chapter. I bet you’re waiting for me to finally straighten it out. You thought it should read, “Been there; done that.”

But what I put there is what I meant.

I grew tired of church-hunting. I wanted to settle into to a church so I could grow. Hence, I was done there. I was done looking for a church because I realized I was slipping away from God since I didn’t have a church home. I had been that person before. I had slipped away from God before.

So I was done there and been that!

I got on a good diet of Bible study, fellowship with other Christians, reading Christian books, and prayer. I started a journal of my hurts, good moments, and just remembering the day. It was a great way to look back at my growth—or lack of it.

We need to be done there with all the negative barriers. We cannot remain in the world of hurt; the world of worry, or the world of fear.

We have been that long enough. We can’t allow Satan to run our life. He has done it long enough. God needs to take over—and we need to let Him. He can carry us the rest of the way.

Yes, you have been that. You have been what you had hoped you would never be, but you will be done there. You never have to carry that heavy load again.

We can turn to God and say, “I am done there. I have been that for too many years, and I need Your love to be with me to keep me from going back.”

Like the loving Father He is, He will open His arms and take care of you.

 

We have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power

is from God and not from us.

2 Corinthians 4:7

 

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that or your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.

1 Peter 3:3–4

 

Further Adventures

We all struggle. We all have failed at one time or another. We all have wished we would be strong and keep doing things that will make us healthy both physically and mentally. But you know what? We are humans! We can talk ourselves out of anything. It can be, “Oh that piece of cake won’t cause me too much trouble. I won’t be depressed if I fail. It is OK to not exercise to make me physically strong.” Wrong! Wrong! And wrong again.

We need both physical growth and spiritual growth. They go together hand in hand. When you’re at your proper weight and physically fit, you feel much better about yourself and want to go even further by cleaning out your polluted mind of all harmful thoughts that tear you down. Strong physically; strong mentally. You are a clean serene fighting machine.

 

Something to Ponder

Isn’t it funny how some choose their friends by their outward appearance, and yet they don’t like themselves?

 

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If You Are Going the Wrong Way, God Allows U-Turns

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We have a bookstore for you to check out. There is the book I feature as excerpts in my post for sale there. The book, “Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World,” is on a special sale right now with some good savings.

This book reaches out to those who may be suffering with anxiety, fear, depression, addictions, self-doubt, hopelessness, and the many other usual suspects.  

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Today’s excerpt lets us know that no matter what path we may take, God allows U-turns to get us on the right path.

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 Chapter 44

 

If You’re Going the Wrong Way,

God Allows U-Turns

 

Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out,

that times of refreshing may come from the Lord.

Acts3:19

 

Time is always ticking away! In my home we have a battery-operated clock that makes a loud ticking noise for every second of the day. The clock had been right at my computer desk and I could hear it as I worked. It made me think that my life was slowly going by. What have I done with my life? My life was ticking away, and I could see (and hear) each second go by.

The clock got moved into the utility room, but not before its cadence of marking time prompted me to do a “bed check” of my life. Bed checks are something that all military people understand. As you sleep, the barrack sergeant comes through and makes sure everyone is in bed—to make sure everything was OK.

So now every day I do a bed check to see if I am OK. It is so easy to “slide” if I don’t constantly check up on myself.

We tend to get all fired up about our commitment to God, even go to the church altar for prayer. We have a close encounter and are very happy. Life is good and we’ll serve God forever.

Then we get very busy and miss a few Sundays at church. Bible study gets scheduled on the evening all of our friends get together to play Bunco or go bowling—or whatever. We rush out of the house in the morning and collapse into a chair when we get home at night. There’s just no time for reading the Bible and praying.

Eventually, we fail “bed check.” We get wrapped up in our own world and get in touch with God only when there is a crisis. He will still be there to help, but our lives have lost their real meaning. We have allowed ourselves to go into a spiritual twilight zone.

Time is ticking away. There is no way to buy it back. Once it is gone, it is gone forever. But as long as God gives us another breath, it is not too late to turn around and get back into the loving arms of God. Our God is an awesome God. He loves us very much, and He will be there to accept us in whatever state we have allowed ourselves to lapse into.

As we get back into the center of His love and try to walk in His path, we will have done a spiritual U-turn.

 

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalm 34:18

 

I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent.

Luke 15:7

 

Further Adventures

Do your own bed check. Think about the direction you’re going. Do you need to make a U-turn? God allows you to get back in His love any time you want to seek Him more. His love is everlasting. He never forgets you. He never turns His back on you. After all, He even knows every hair on your head doesn’t He? Make that big turn and drive (or dive) into the loving arms of your heavenly Father.

 

Something to Ponder

Isn’t it funny that if we confess our sins to God, He is faithful and just enough to forgive us and to cleanse us from every wrong?

 

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Loved the Wedding; Invite Me to the Marriage-God

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The book, “Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World, is available in our bookstore now. This books reaches out to those who may suffer from anxiety, fear, depression, addictions, self-doubt, hopelessness, and the many other usual suspects.

In the retail stores it sells for $19.99, but on this site it is only $15.99. The shipping has been cut in half as well. A total savings of over $6.00. Just click on the “Bookstore,” tab at the top of this page.

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I am sharing with you an actual excerpt from the book, “Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World.” This excerpt talks about what we do after we have our weddings. Do we leave God in our lives, or do we wing it on our own?

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Chapter 36

 

Loved the Wedding; Invite Me to the Marriage

—God

 

However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself,

and the wife must respect her husband.

Ephesians 5:33

 

For the past several decades, weddings have been held in churches. That is a good place to start a life together. The minister talks about loving each other and establishing a Christian home. All things seem to be in place.

It is always a beautiful thing to observe—two people holding hands and making vows of everlasting love. The mothers of the bride and groom have tears in their eyes. Some dads wonder when the ceremony will end. The newly married couple can’t wait to head out on their honeymoon. The reception is a real celebration. Everyone is happy, and the day ends.

Then what? The next day is a new day, and it is the first day of a young couple’s new life together. Decisions have to be made together. They go everywhere together. They are now a team that will last forever.

Eventually the scene changes a little. Both spouses find they need some time alone, but they’re afraid to say so. Resentment can build and they may feel like the walls are closing in on them.

It’s sort of like going to church on Sunday—and then there is Monday. What do you do then? What do you do with what the pastor said in the sermon? How do you make it practical—something you can use all week?

Often the message is soon forgotten, and nothing happens to make Monday any different. We sit and listen to the advice and sermon points on Sunday, sometimes even nodding our agreement, and then we ignore them on Monday.

The advice and promises that are part of the marriage ceremony are vital to the ongoing relationship with a spouse. But during the actual ceremony the bride and groom aren’t listening to the advice. Instead, they’re trying to remember the words they have to say, or they’re worrying about their hair or how they look or if there will be enough food for the guests.

They go into their life together, winging it, flying with no parachute. Marriage does not have to be an on-the-job training situation.

Does this ring a bell? Do you remember your wedding day? Was it all about listening to the advice the minister gave you, or was it about making sure you sliced the wedding cake just right? Maybe it was making sure the photographer took one more picture.

We’ve all been there. It is an exciting, wonderful, important, stressful, nerve-racking day. It is the day we dream of all our lives, and we want to have all the memories forever.

But as you go on with your lives together, what happens next? Is the same spark there five years later? How about ten years later? We are supposed to still love when the wrinkles come and the fire is not as hot.

Have you agreed on how plans should work out, or have you agreed to disagree?

Getting married is one of the most important decisions we make in our lives. If we plan to live a lifetime together with our spouse, shouldn’t we talk to a minister ahead of time? Wouldn’t it be good to seek out what God has in mind? Marriage counseling to learn more about a future spouse would also be in order.

These things may seem obvious, but you would be amazed how many people do not do any of those things. Some feel it is more fun to run off toRenoto get married. Others decide to live together and not even get married.

God loves for us to be happy and have companionship, within the context of His will. He believes in marriage. That is why He wants us to make sure we’re making the right choices.

Running off and getting married on a whim is like putting all our life’s earnings on a blackjack table and hoping to get a 21. The chances of that happening are slim and none.

I agree that a marriage often does work out in spite of the odds. All I have been saying is pretty harsh, but just like putting all our money on a blackjack table, theRenoodds of a successful marriage are pretty dim too. Does a 50% chance seem acceptable for you? Some surveys say that as many as 50% of marriages fail when they do not have a foundation of premarital counseling that includes having plans for the future in place.

God needs a prominent place in our marriages. We need to let Him be our advisor as we plan for the future. He needs to have a special rent-free place in our hearts. No bargaining. No yearly leases. He needs to be a year-round, full-time resident, helping marriage partners live a life full of love and understanding for each other.

There should always be three people in a marriage: you, your spouse and God. The three of you make an unbeatable team.

 

Marriage should be honored by all.

Hebrews 13:4

Further Adventures

“Will you still love me? Will you still need me, when I’m 65?” That song rings in my ears many times when I look at my bride. She has been with me through the storms and the good times. Do we have nothing but beautiful rainbows every day? That would be backwards, wouldn’t it? You need a little rain to bring on the rainbow.

That is what a marriage is like. You have days when you laugh and have fun with your spouse, but there are other days when you have been hurt by that same spouse. You feel unwanted and dejected. That is when you should buckle down and really work hard at your marriage.

Your spouse is not your enemy. She may be angry at the moment, but she still loves you, and by sitting down and discussing the hurts and dejections you feel, the rainbow will come out again. The key is to still love your spouse with all your heart—even when she is 65 and her age is starting to show.

 

Something to Ponder

Isn’t it funny how much easier it is to forgive than to hold a grudge?