Tag: hopelessness

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I Child-Proofed my House-and They Still Get in

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We have been sharing excerpts from my new books “Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World.” This book is perfect for those on your Easter list that you have search for something encouraging to give them.

This book reaches out to those who may be suffering from anxiety, fear, depression, addictions, self-doubt, hopelessness, and the many other usual suspects.

Just click on the “Bookstore,” tan above to check it out. It is also on a special sale.

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Today’s excerpt is about Father’s Day and the importance of loving your children.

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Chapter 56

 

I Child-Proofed My House—and They Still Get In

 

Righteous Father, though the world does not know you, I know you, and they know that you have sent me. I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them.

John 17:25–26

 

When Father’s Day nears, I’m glad I’m finally old enough to have all the neckties I need, so no one gives me one as a gift. Instead of another tie, I get to share time with my children and grandchildren. What could be a better present than that? The answer to my question is that the very best present I ever got on a Father’s Day was that my daughter DG was born on that day. Top that one!

Father’s Day is a time for men to think about their roles. Men, we are to be the leaders of our families (not in an “I’m the one in charge here” sort of way, mind you) and should play the role of hero to our children.

We as men sometimes think that on Father’s Day we should be treated to a day of watching sports or doing whatever we want—that would be the “manly” thing to do. I once thought that myself. Sports came first. I got irritated when I got disturbed by the rest of the family. God changed that for me, and I have a totally different outlook on Father’s Day.

On Father’s Day in 2003, my son, my granddaughter and I went to church together. I enjoyed the day very much. The sermon was based on John 17:25–26. It is about Jesus praying to God just before He was betrayed by Judas.

As I read verse 26, I could see that it was perfect for us as fathers. Just go through verse 26 along with me. It reads: “I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them.”

Every father needs to say this prayer! We should be making God known to our children, just as Jesus made Him known to all of His children. Pastor Scott Nelson ofMorningstarCommunityChurchinSalem,Oregon, made this very true statement: “A father needs to live the Word of God, not just teach it.” We need to be the hero in our children’s lives.

We dads may often feel we have failed as a father. We didn’t play catch with our children as often as we should have when they were little. We didn’t take them to the park as often as we think we should have. And sometimes we’ve put material things ahead of our children. You’re not alone. There is not one father who has not felt some guilt in this situation.

But we can’t let this cause us to think we’re a failure as fathers! Satan loves to try to pull us down by causing confusion in our lives. As a matter of fact there is often a battle going on with the devil because of the circumstances God has allowed into our lives.

Yes, God allows things to happen to us. Why would He do this? Why wouldn’t He just protect us all the time?

I have learned that God uses these situations in an effort to teach me something. When I feel up against it, I really need to ask myself these questions: “What is God trying to teach me? What should I learn from this trial? What has God planned for me from this situation?”

Let me make something very clear: God wants us to depend on Him. He wants to flood our souls with His love. He wants us to seek adventures (often cleverly disguised as adversity) and let Him guide us. It may be difficult at the moment to see adversity as God breaking you and shaping you during a trial, but that is what He is doing.

I went through that in my life. I finally gave up and let God take over my life. I went through many trials and adversity before I finally let Him take charge and guide me.

There is a song that talks about God knowing my name and my every thought—and even about each of my tears that fall.

Realize that He is with you always! He even knows your name! Our children need to learn this truth from us. They need to know that they have not only an earthly father they also have a heavenly Father. They need to know they will always have someone to turn to.

My challenge to each of you is: What are you doing to make sure your children know God? Today is the first day of the rest of your life. If you feel you have had a battle going on in your life and you haven’t spent enough time teaching your children about God, start now! I don’t care if you just become a father and have a newborn, or you’re a grandparent. You are still the father of your children until you go to be with the Lord. Show them by example what it means to follow God. Talk to them about how God has blessed you. They will see the love you have for not only them, but for God.

 

These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts.

Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and

when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.

Deuteronomy 6:6–7

Further Adventures

June is Father’s Month. It is the month that we as fathers get a little press in our home. It should make you feel good and help you feel wanted. But that is not always the case. Are you a single dad who won’t even see your children on Father’s Day? Have you decided to abandon your children so you won’t ever see them again?

Sounds a little sad, doesn’t it? This is way too common in our society. The broken home rates are getting higher each year. It is much easier to leave a marriage than try to save it. Sounds simpler to just pack up and leave—that will make your life much easier. Not so. The first thing that you as a father need to do is think not only about your marriage, but also about your children. They are in the middle. Your leaving is certainly is not their fault, but they may think it is.

This next Father’s Day, think about where you are in your relationship with your family. Have you tried to reconcile with your wife? Have you done everything you can to have time with your children? Do you care about what happens to them? If you say no to any of these questions, it is time to do a U-turn! Put your family first! It may be a broken family, but do whatever you can to help your children live a happy and normal life. There is nothing more rewarding than that as far as your children go.

 

Something to Ponder

Isn’t it funny how often we get upset with our children, but love them so much?

 

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Every Temptation is an Opportunity to Trust God

A big thank you to those of you who have been signing up for our RSS feed. There have been over 190 of you who have done that recently. This helps us move up in the Google Search Rankings.

 Help us go even higher by signing up today if you haven’t already. Just click on the icon right after the title to do that.

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We have been sharing excerpts from the book, “Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World.”  This book is a perfect book to give as a gift right now. Easter is only a couple of weeks away.

This book reaches out to those who may suffer from anxiety, fear, depression, addictions, self-doubt, hopelessness, and the many other usual suspects.

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The book is on sale right now, so check it out by clicking on the “Bookstore,” tab above.

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Today’s excerpt talks about how we as new Christians will face many temptations. It guides us through the process of how to remain strong.

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Chapter 54

 

Every Temptation Is an Opportunity to Trust God

 

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

1 Corinthians 10:13

 

When someone becomes a Christian, Satan starts working overtime to try to pull that person away from God. He hates it that one more person has accepted the love of God into their lives. He will do whatever he can to turn the new Christian around, and head him or her back into sin.

We have so much fun each day just trying to make it through the day fighting off temptations. I mean this as a challenge and not as a joke. We face temptations constantly to do what God would not want us to do. He allows a different close encounter to approach us in the form of many temptations going through our mind every day. It could be something small like telling an off-color joke to others in an effort to fit in, or something more serious like deciding to take home a business camera that no one will miss.

Being tempted is part of being human. God does not protect us from temptation. He allows it into our lives so we can learn to depend on Him. The verse above promises that He “will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.” It is our chance to build on solid ground for our eternal blessings. We are never free of temptations. It doesn’t matter how long we have been a Christian—Satan will tempt us. When we fall for the temptation, it’s because we have turned our back on the “way out” God has promised.

Jesus was tempted by Satan for forty days. He was offered a great deal of power in the world. He was given a chance to be king over all the kings. He was offered all the land He could see in all directions from the high place He was standing. He was tempted in every way you could think possible. This man called Jesus, who is the embodiment of how we should live on this earth, turned His back on all of the temptations! The way of escape for Him was falling back on the promises of God from Scripture.

We have the same power to not be caught by temptation by calling to mind God’s promises to us.

            We face temptations every day. (I am a sucker for Snickers candy bars, every time I see one in the store.) We need to concentrate on doing what is right each time we face a temptation. There is a very simple way to approach each and every temptation we face. Just ask, “What would Jesus do in this situation?” I mean, we can really ask that question each and every time we are tempted.

Example: Guys, a female friend asks you to help her put up a fence. About halfway through, she invites you into the house for something to drink. When you get inside, you see by what she’s wearing that she has other intentions. She comes close to you, and says that it would be OK to have a little fun. “No one will know,” she promises. What would Jesus do?

There is one thing you should do right away. You should run out of there like Joseph ran from the wife of Potiphar. You should run like you are being chased by a rabid dog looking for someone to bite.

Potiphar’s wife had tried for several days to get Joseph to sleep with her, and he refused. Then when he was close, and no one was around, she grabbed his cloak and ordered him to sleep with her. He broke loose and ran out of the house. He resisted temptation even though Potiphar’s wife tried so hard to seduce him.

Why did he run? Why should you run? It didn’t turn out well for Joseph. Potiphar’s wife became angry because he wouldn’t sleep with her. She accused Joseph of trying to seduce her. Even though he hadn’t touched her, Potiphar put him in prison for several years. Not a good situation for a young man that did everything he could to please God.

But there is a happy ending to the story of Joseph. In Genesis 39–50 we see how God brought Joseph through temptation and made him instrumental in His plan for the nation of Israel, giving him a place of prominence Joseph never could have dreamed would be his. It is one of the most wonderful stories in the Bible and I often wonder if the story would have ended as it did had Joseph not taken the “way out” God provided. Probably not.

Sometimes the “way out” may be simply walking away from temptation. Other times we may have to run as fast as we can.

As a child, I used to go to a movie in the downtown area of Salem, Oregon. It was within walking distance of my home. It was all right going to the movie, because it was still light. But on the way home it was very dark, and bushes lined the sidewalk where I had to walk. I knew there was a monster in those bushes and he was ready to grab me! I think I set some kind of record as I ran by those bushes. I was not about to be caught be some evil demon. I stayed in the middle of the street so a monster couldn’t grab me from either side.

All of us have monsters—real or imagined—in the bushes. Temptations are the real ones that we all face at some time in life. What is important is that each and every time we are faced with some kind of temptation, we ask, “What would Jesus do? What is the ‘way out’ He is providing me?”

 

[God’s grace] teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions,

and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives.

Titus 2:12

 

Because he himself suffered when he was tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted.

Hebrews 2:18

 

Further Adventures

Think before you leap! Always be on alert. Think of life as a war between God and Satan. You are on the good guy’s side. You need to be careful of the attacks from the guy on the other side. He will do whatever he can to destroy you. He will try to convince you that what you are doing is OK just this one time. No one will know. Stop! That is not the good guy talking. That is the enemy! Trust God, and God only. Everything else is the enemy.

 

Something to Ponder

Isn’t it funny how some of us never hear the music before the song is over?

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A Small Stumble May Lead to a Big Fall

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We have been sharing excerpts from the book, “Signs of Hope: Ways to survive in an Unfriendly World.” This book is a perfect gift for Easter, which is just a couple weeks away.

The book reaches out those who may be suffering from anxiety, fear, depression, addictions, self-doubt, hopelessness, and the many other usual suspects. It is on a special sale right now. So click on the “Bookstore,” tab at the top of this page to check it out.

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The excerpt today is my favorite chapter from the book, “Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World.” It is a true story about a young lady who stumbled on her notes, while playing a piano at a recital, and how she overcame it.

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Chapter 52

 

A Small Stumble May Lead to a Big Fall

 

Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings.

1 Peter 5:8–9

 

Lydia Moeller was at her recital and ready to play for the audience. The girl before her finished and Lydiawalked onto the platform. She sat down and began to play “The Enchanted Stream” by Christopher Goldston. She started out playing a beautiful tune, but about halfway through she stumbled when she forgot her notes. She stopped, tried to start, and stopped again. You could she the emotions building, and tears were coming down her face. Then a wonderful thing happened. She regrouped and played the song without error. So, yes, she stumbled, but she didn’t fall. She kept her balance and finished the race. I said to her afterwards that I was very impressed with her. Not that she stumbled, but that she finished the race.

Do you stumble and fall because you have worries and problems that overtake you? Well, you are not alone my friend. This is an all too common occurrence in our lives.

We let enemies like divorce, abuse, overweight, low self-esteem, depression, fear of failure and bills that are not paid to cause us to stumble, and wonder, Where is God?

 

Satan loves this kind of doubt. He can plant many thoughts in our heads to cause us to fall even further. Some of these worries may be small by themselves, but put enough of them together and they become as large asMt.Everest.

That broken-down car isn’t such a horrible thing, but you have already missed some work because of it, and your boss said you are not to miss any more work. The illness that attacked your daughter isn’t life-threatening, but you have no insurance to pay for the doctor’s visit. You want to put that glass of whiskey down, but you can’t.

Each of these issues may be small to some people, but for you it is like taking on Sir Lancelot and his sword with a wet noodle, or trying to swim ten miles and not knowing how to swim.

Some of the most successful people in the Bible have stumbled many times, and still are loved by God.

Abraham lied—not once but twice—to save his skin, but God gave him all the land he could see and promised that he would be the father of a nation.

Moses killed a man, and doubted God many times, but he led the nation ofIsraelout ofEgypt. 

Rahab was a prostitute, but her heart was open to God, and she protected three spies for Joshua. God in turn spared her life.

David committed adultery and had a man killed to cover up the first sin. (And both of these sins are biggies in our book.) Yet, God called him “a man after his own heart.”

Jonah tried to run away from what God commanded him to do and was swallowed by a whale. He later followed God’s command to preach to all the people inNineveh.

Peter denied knowing Jesus three times, but became one of the prominent leaders in the early church.

Each one of us has stumbled many times. We have the choice to lie there flat on our face when we stumble, or we can get back up and continue our walk with God. The longer we lie there, though, the harder it can be to get back up and into the race again.

We wonder sometimes why God would love us. The good news is that He loves us just the way we are. But He doesn’t want us to stay that way. He didn’t want all those people in the Bible to remain they way they were. However, He accepted them the way they were, and transformed them into spiritual leaders.

How can we change? By taking our focus off our failures, fear and worries and turning them over to God.

The mind is like a stream running through our brain and the stream has been polluted. It will tear us down and eventually affect everything if we let it. When we stop the flow of “sewage” (unwholesome input, negative thinking) to the brain, it will take awhile for the creek to clear. We can’t clean up all the sewage at once, but we need to take the first steps.

Before he became the king of Israel, David was so down and desperate that he had to live in a cave to get away from his pursuer—the king himself. It was there that he realized that all he had to do was to cry out to God, asking Him to protect him and bring him back to where God really wanted him to be.

I myself was so down from my stumbling that I seriously considered suicide. I cried out to God to rescue me, and He did.

We need to not focus on our times of stumbling and need to focus on God instead. Our weeks need to include reading the Bible, praying to God for guidance, going to church to be with other Christians, being part of a Bible study, and reading Christian books (like mine, of course!) We need to take time to be with other Christians.

We can’t afford to dwell on the negative. Instead, we need to seek out the positive. If we have failed in the past (and we all have in one degree or another), we are not doomed to live in the past. God desires that we live for today—and the future.

Others may have turned their backs on us because of our stumbling and seeming inability to “get it together.” But they’re only seeing the outside. Remember that God looks at the heart (1 Sam. 16:7).

Maybe you haven’t stumbled, but you think people look down on you because you don’t have as many of this world’s possessions as they have—or maybe you have more than they do. Or maybe you feel you don’t measure up in other ways—too overweight, too this, too that, or not enough this or enough that.

Remember, please, that God doesn’t care about any of those issues. He is looking at your heart. He is looking for you to follow Him and do great things for Him.

Satan uses our stumbling to tell us we might as well give up. “You won’t succeed no matter how much you try,” he whispers. You want to stop smoking, but you can’t. You want to finish that project your wife has been screaming for you to finish, but you don’t have the desire. You can fill in the blanks because you know what your issues are.

Please don’t give up. Never give up! Find friends you can turn to at times like this. Share your fears and let them be your protectors, coaches and encouragers. A true friend wants only the best for you, will listen and not criticize, and is a person you can feel safe with. A true friend may have to say some hard things to you, but his intention is that you become the best person you can be.

I have friends like that here on earth, but I also have one more—Jesus Himself. He meets all the criteria listed above for a true friend. I am never alone—He is always just a prayer away.

We don’t have to try to make more money—or lose 50 pounds, or climb the ladder at work—to feel worthy in His sight. Our willingness to simply turn all our troubles over to God and let Him love us is the “proof” of our worth. Success in this life can be measured by how much we love God and desire to serve Him.

So you’re not in line to be named as the next Pope. You’ve done some things you’re not proud of? You gave up too early on a dream? Do you feel like Custer and you’re on your last stand? Do bad things keep resurfacing like a cork in a lake?

Well, join the “Been there and done that” club. Here’s a news flash: Churches are filled with the down-and-out. They may look like the “up-and-in” crowd, but they need someone who’s “been there and done that” to come alongside them for encouragement and fellowship. You may be the one person in your entire church who can honestly say to that person, “I know how you feel.”

I have a hearing problem. I have to wear hearing aids in both ears. I have learned to use selective hearing. (Don’t tell my wife!) I take off my hearing aids when I want a quiet time. I go somewhere that noise cannot find me, where I can really concentrate on reading the Bible or praying.

However, I’ve found there are two types of thoughts I can always hear, and I get to choose which side of the “argument” I’ll listen to:

  1. Yes you can … No you can’t.
  2. God will help you … There is no God.
  3. You have self-worth … You are worthless.

All of us can choose to use selective hearing too. We can turn a deaf ear to those stumbling days and the years of doubts. We can walk the straight path toward the future and listen only to God.

I don’t seem to hear Satan as much anymore—because of the ear-plug effect. I can choose to plug the ears to my thoughts and not allow negative thoughts to penetrate, but open my mind’s ears wide to uplifting, soothing thoughts.

All of us have ears; we just haven’t learned to use them properly. We can turn the volume down on people who want to degrade us and turn up the volume on those who come alongside to help us.

When we’re standing knee deep in a river and dying of thirst from feeling depressed, dejected and beaten down, we can wade ashore and quench our thirst on the love of God. God responds to our sighs, our tears, our fears—even our stumbling and falling—as a prayer to Him.

Each of us is a child of God—made in His image. Don’t you think that since He went as far as to make us in His own image that He will do everything He can to love and do what is best for each one of us? Of course He will.

Stop stumbling and start walking with God.

 

Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.

James 1:12

 

Further Adventures

We all fail sometimes. It may be small thing like forgetting where the car keys are. It may be you lost the important papers your boss told you to take are of. It may be a broken marriage. It may even be your own job that you have lost.

It’s what you do after each of these happens that shows what we are made of. I can’t tell you how many times I have lost my keys. I have had to haveCharlottebail me out often by getting the keys for me, but I am still driving. I didn’t give up driving because I feared I would lose the keys again.

I have lost important papers. I had this book all done and was getting ready to go back through to add some Further Adventures to it like the one you’re reading now. I completely finished it one time. But somehow I lost the whole file. I think I must have sent to a friend and asked him to proofread it, forgetting who I sent it to. I haven’t found it to this very day. So this is my second attempt at writing this Further Adventure. I vaguely remember what I wrote originally, and I like this one much more. Could it be that it was God who “lost” that file for me?

The point to all of this is that you stumble and you fall. I did. You need to get back up, dust yourself off and start all over again. I will get all the Future Adventures done the second time, and now I am convinced they will be better than the first time I wrote them.

 

Something to Ponder

Isn’t it funny that we seek happiness from the outside, but true happiness is found on the inside?