We have another excerpt from, “Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World,” today. It is chapter seven. It is called, “Be a Friend to Someone.” It talks about being there for someone who is suffering.
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Chapter 7
Be a Friend to Someone
Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights.
No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was.
Job2:13(emphasis mine)
Job went through every kind of hardship you can imagine, but his worst hardship was the loss of his own children. Just think how devastated you would be if all of your children perished in one day.
The friends of Job knew that saying things like, “We are so sorry this happened to you,” would not help at all. So they just stayed near him to help him feel comfortable, and waited.
Many of us have friends who are heroes to us. This is because they never look down on you. They are always there for you when you need them. They still like you when you’ve made a mistake. The following talks about how you can be a hero to someone at a critical time of their life.
What do you say when you are with a person who has just lost a loved one? Do you try to explain why God took them? Do you say how sorry you are that it happened?
I lost my father onMay 4, 2001, and it was very hard for me, because we had grown so close in the final two weeks of his life. At the service, people kept coming up to me and saying how sorry they were, and that my father was at peace now. “If there anything I can do,” many of them said. None of this helped me at all. I knew they meant well, but I wanted them to go away and leave me alone.
The one person that really helped me through the whole service was my wife, Charlotte. She never said anything to me about how I was going to be OK. She just held my hand the whole time, and silently gave me reassurance. That was what I really needed! I wanted her to stay close to me, because she—not all the well-wishers who kept coming past me in the receiving line—was the one who was really helping me.
Job lost his children and most of his possessions. Some of his friends came to him and mourned with him. They just sat with him and didn’t say a word. He had a tremendous close encounter with God, and his friends were there to share it with him.
When you are with a friend or loved one who has a loss, just be there and be close to them. You don’t have to saying anything. Your presence will be their comfort. Reminds me of the little boy who walked in the door and announced that he had just visited the newly widowed neighbor.
“What did you say?” his surprised mother asked.
“Nothing. I just sat on her lap and cried with her.”
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and
God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort
those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.
For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives,
so also through Christ our comfort overflows.
2 Corinthians 1:3–5
Further Adventures
Have you been to a funeral where you didn’t know what to say to the mourning family? Try saying nothing. They are glad you came to honor their loved one who has passed away. A hug and a smile will do wonders.
Something to Ponder
Isn’t it funny how friends are like the walls of a house? Sometimes they hold you up. Sometimes you lean on them. But sometimes it’s enough to know they’re just standing by.