Transition Out of The Military Can be a Daunting Experience for Military Soldiers

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Marine Lt. Col. Stuart Scheller was sentenced on Friday to receive a punitive letter of reprimand and forfeit $5,000 of one month’s pay after pleading guilty to all charges stemming from his public tirades against top military and civilian leaders.

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Sgt. Maj. of the Army Michael Grinston wants leaders to stop scheduling training just for the sake of it. Instead, he wants soldiers to make time for something very important.

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What follows is a long article written by a soldier going through transition to civilian life. I am using it to help those who may be struggle since they left the military:

A veteran’s ordeal after hanging up the uniform in an America he doesn’t recognize

Nothing had prepared me to live.

Sitting at the required transition briefing at my last military duty station, I watched a ridiculous civilian brief a room full of soldiers about our Veterans Affairs health and educational benefits.

I zoned in and out until he said, “Not everyone thinks your service is a good thing.”

My mind slowed down.

Before my eyes flashed all the news articles I had read about veterans leaving the service and landing amazing careers.

Weren’t headhunters recruiting Army junior officers like me? Wasn’t I being thanked every time I stepped outside the base for my service?

He was greatly misinformed. America loved its warriors.

Even if things were difficult for veterans, I was surely an exception. As an Army captain with command experience, with multiple degrees, and with combat time, as far as I was concerned, I was a damned unicorn

Then I left the confines of the base, took off my uniform.

Months and months after applying and applying and applying to hundreds of openings, I sat across from a human resources representative for a “military friendly” company. She had heard me speak at length about my service and deployments. She glanced at the resume I had specifically crafted for the job opening of head basket weaver. She calmly put down my paperwork, looked me in the eye, and said:

“Yes … yes … ” as she waved away my service with her hand, “but you have no real experience, do you?”

In the lobby sat another officer far more accomplished than I, awaiting an interview. The day after, there would be more. It wasn’t the last time I would encounter this.

My service wasn’t an accomplishment. It was a liability. It was just missed years of real employment—as far as I could see.

I started to see my visits to “hero” job fairs—with recruiters who looked dubiously upon my multiple degrees and combat experiences—as a financial and mental health liability to me. They offered no possibilities beyond accepting a resume, then citing a “poor fit” for any positions. One offered me a minimum-wage security guard position, knowing I desperately needed the work.

Where were the former officers from Forbes magazine and the poster children of Fortune 500 military websites? The real unicorns had fled the stables.

I was searching. I was searching for good examples of veterans who had left and hadn’t killed themselves or hooked themselves on drugs or lost their best selves in dead-end employment.

I was looking for an employer who wouldn’t treat me as the solution to years of fiscal monsters. The personnel mismanagement gods expected me to deliver a solution, like all mythical heroes, like those “skilled in the ways of contending” do.

I had become so wrapped up in my employment that I couldn’t see around me.

My children were growing like grass while I kept watch over at the distant sandstorms of Iraq, as if I were still driving there and wishing at times I was.

So I put away my service in a box and worked through Veterans Day. I watched resumes come across my desk that dripped in military acronyms, ones I knew would never see the light of day. I read another beautifully crafted document where the veteran had reduced his entire military officer service into a single line.

But the more I ignored who I was, the more I was reminded by my coworkers and others.

“This is probably cake compared to Iraq, right?”

“I don’t think I could have done what you did.”

During formal introductions at a company event, I hear the dreaded question come, from a tall man with salt and pepper hair.

“Where did you work before?”

I took a breath and recounted and, as an afterthought, added, “I was also in the military for a bit.”

His eyes lit up. I clenched, waiting for the usual formal questions about my sanity and the later casual questions about how many people I had killed.

Instead, he said, “Follow me.”

I resisted saying, like all good soldiers, “Lead the way.”

I walked down the hallway into his office. On the wall, hanging, were the requisite degrees and family photos.John Thampi in Tallil, Iraq, in 2005, where he served as a second lieutenant. Photo courtesy of the author.

John Thampi in Tallil, Iraq, in 2005, where he served as a second lieutenant.

In between all of them was a smudge of green—a younger version of him, standing among a group of men from the Ranger Battalion. I turned to him, eyes widened. He laughed..

It wasn’t the only time I would meet men and women like this. The veterans I had looked for in posters and magazines were all around me. They were doing what I felt I was doing, working and living, quietly and without a narrator’s voice in their ears.

I recall sitting for an interview debriefing. The company I worked for had reviewed multiple candidates, and some veterans and the HR manager asked me, “So what do we look for? What badge, what years of service, what locations?”

What was the combination that ensured the company got a mythic corporate hero instead of raving suitor-killing lunatic?

I didn’t have an answer then.

Maybe if they had the patience to hear it, I would tell them the protagonist never really comes back. Rather, it’s his friend who returns to an America he doesn’t recognize. He adjusts, and studies to become a teacher, and attends baseball games again, getting used to large crowds. I would go on to explain that he is married now and has children, and that he refuses to define himself by his service.

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A reminder that I have a new book coming out soon. It is called, Signs of Hope for the Military: In an Out of the Trenches of Life.

There will be many chapters sharing my time in the military, plus many more that speak specifically about PTSD, war wounds, depression, etc. It also is a book for all of those who suffer from “battle fatique,” and many other problems once you get out of the military.

I suggest you come back to this site often, because I will be sharing more excerpts for you to read. Better yet…go to the top of this page and click on “subscribe.” When you do all future posts will come directly to your inbox.

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So…how are your days going? Too long? Hate to go to sleep at night?

FEAR NOT!!

There are over 13,250 fellow veterans here on this site who have your back.

However, it the road is too rough for you to walk, GET HELP!!

Here is a toll free number to call 24/7. There are highly qualified counselors there to help you, and they will not hang up until they know you are OK?

1-800-273-8255…texting 838255.

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Remember:

You are never alone.

You are never forsaken.

You are never unloved.

And above all…never, ever, give up!

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If You Feel Overwhelmed From Your Service to Your Country, Get Help!

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Military news…

China is building missile silos left and right, and it has the new Air Force secretary on edge. Former Army officer Frank Kendall warned that the new silos indicate China is developing a “first strike” nuclear weapons capability, which represents a major “destabilizing move,” Kendall warned.

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There is a massive 2000-year-old gold treasure missing in Afghanistan and the Taliban is trying to find it. In fact, it’s one of the largest collections of gold in the world, and until recently its existence was known by only a select few.

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A married Army officer who allegedly spent years creating an elaborate web of lies to deceive women has been fired following an investigation. Lt. Col. Richard Kane Mansir, a civil affairs officer based in Joint Base Langley-Eustis, Virginia, had a “playbook” of lies he he told women, one of them said.

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Army Lt. Richard Collins III had just been commissioned as an intelligence officer when he was killed in an apparent hate crime. Now his parents are trying desperately to have him buried in Arlington National Cemetery. But it is an uphill struggle, and all because of a loophole in Army policy.

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You wouldn’t think that a big, lumbering C-17 cargo jet could pull off a hair-raising aerial stunt, but one such aircraft just did in Australia. A video posted to Reddit shows a Royal Australian Air Force C-17 flying between skyscrapers in a stunt which looks cool but is incredibly dangerous, according to one U.S. Air Force pilot.

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I have been sharing the table of contents from, Signs of Hope for the Military: in and Out of the Trenches of Life. So here is some more chapter titles:

Ft. Bragg

Sitting on the Military Plane

We were all sitting on a plane ready to fly to the Bay of Pigs.

White Lightening

My first experience with homemade booze

Scars Only Show where you Have Been, Not Where You Are Going

It is hard for service men and women to come home after the scars they acquired while on duty.

No Reinforcements Coming

There are times when we feel we are fighting our battles alone

F.E.A.R.

Forget everything and run, or Face everything and rise

People Don’t Understand Me

What can we do for those who have PTSD in their Marriage?

Deployment Can be Hard on a family

Leaving a spouse behind to take care of everything can be very hard.

Marriage is Not a Four Letter Word

There is no “perfect marriage,” just two imperfect people who refuse to give up.

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In my next post on Wednesday, I will share the rest of the chapters in my upcoming book, Signs of hope for the Military: In and Out of the Trenches of Life.

Be sure to come back and check them out. BETTER YET!!

Go to the top of this page and click on “Subscribe.” When you do all future posts will come directly to your inbox.

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How are you doing? is the world spinning too fast for you? Are the nights fearful.

FEAR NOT!!

There are over 13,025 fellow veterans on this site who have your back.

If you are dizzy still, GET HELP!

Here is a toll free number to call 24/7. They have highly qualified counselors there to help you, and they will not hang up until the know you are OK.

1-800-273-8255…Texting 838255.

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Remember:

You are never alone.

You are never forsaken.

You are never unloved.

And above all…never, ever, give up!

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+If you like what you see, please subscribe at the top of this page where it says, “subscribe.” When you do, all future posts will come directly to your inbox. Also, if you know some else who could benefit from this site, please let them know .

Stories of Near Death Experiences and Some very Funny Moments

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Some military news:

“We’ve got to keep pushing on this” Sgt. Maj. of the Army Michael Grinston talked about the branch’s efforts to prevent more soldiers like Spc. Vanessa Guillén from being sexually harassed and murdered. Thursday marked exactly a year since Guillén first went missing: and her death forced a reckoning within the Army on how it treats its lower enlisted soldiers, particularly women.
“They leaned into the danger, firing as fast as they could” was how Marine Gen. John Kelly described the last moments of Cpl. Jonathan Yale and Lance Cpl. Jordan Haerter, two Marine grunts who died exactly 13 years ago Thursday while trying to stop a truck carrying 2,000 pounds of explosives as it barreled toward their post in Ramadi, Iraq. Marine veteran and Task & Purpose deputy editor James Clark remembered the fallen infantrymen and the lives they led in a moving story. Both Marines were posthumously awarded the Navy Cross for their actions that day.

Speaking of sacrifice, Navy vet Stephanie Kroot is one of only 50 or so Americans to have donated two of her organs to two separate people, literally giving parts of herself to save the lives of strangers. But those donations are only the latest episodes in Kroot’s long life of service, which includes stints as a police officer, a Navy intelligence specialist, and a critical care nurse. Yeah, she’s good people.

There’s a first time for everything, like sending a general officer to court-martial, as the Air Force found out on Wednesday when it referred a sexual assault charge against Maj. Gen. William T. Cooley to a general court-martial.The former commander of the Air Force Research Laboratory, Cooley is the first Air Force general in the branch’s 73-year history to be court-martialed, though he’s far from the first to be accused of sexual misconduct.

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There are many soldiers who aren’t happy with the way our country is going. Many have joined ranks and formed their own groups. This is not good. We need to stand together and correct the problem. We do not need hundreds of splinter groups.

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Update on my upcoming book, Signs of Hope of the Military: In and Out of the Trenches of life.

It has been a long time since I last shared the outline of my book. I think it is very helpful to share this to let our kow what is coming.

This is the order that it is written:

  1. Basic training. Lots of funny stuff happened plus some good stuff happened.
  2. Mos training- FT Gordon, GA. Got hit with a hurricane. Fast and furious training.
  3. Korea- Here is where I learned about life. Just a teenager, and facing the dark side of life. Lost two buddies there as well.
  4. FT Bragg, NC. Got a huge scare with the Bay of Pigs incident.

Each section of the main book, will have many pages of things I faced and how I faced them. Some were life threatening. Some were embarrassing. Some were as stupid is and stupid does.

Another section will be interviews with soldiers who were actually in the field. Like WWII, Afghanistan, Iraq, Vietnam, etc.

Many of the interviews will have life threatening stories. Too many of the interviews were with buddies fighting PTSD, TBI, war wounds, etc.

The third section will Appendix #1.

Appendix #1 will have pages and pages of help for you and how to use them.

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How are you doing? Is the mile you walk in life, seem more like a marathon? Is it too difficult to continue the battle?

FEAR NOT!

There are over 11,880 fellow veterans here who have your back. Many of them are people I have met and are sharing some of their lives.

Please know, that if it is just to much for you right now, GET HELP!!

Here is a toll free number that is 24/7.

There are highly trained counselors there to help you. They will not hang up until they know you are OK.

Never, ever, face this world alone!

1-800-273-8255 Option # 1

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Remember:

You are never alone.

You are never forsaken.

You are never unloved.

And never, ever, give up!

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+If you like what you see, please subscribe at the top of this page where it says, “subscribe.” When you do, all future posts will come directly to your inbox. Also, if you know some else who could benefit from this site, please let them know about it.