The Most Precious Things in Life Cannot be Bought

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I will be having a huge announcement about my book, “Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World,” coming up in about a week. That’s all I’m telling you for now. Be sure to come back often to see when it pops up.

This book reaches out to those who may be suffering from anxiety, fear, depression, addictions, self-doubt, hopelessness, and the many other usual suspects.

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I have another excerpt from the book, “Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World.” This chapter is about resentment. Resentment only hurts the person who is full of resentment.

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Chapter 68

 

The Most Precious Things in Life Cannot Be Bought

 

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together imperfect unity (emphasis mine).

Colossians3:12-14

 

Have you ever walked around balancing a chip on your shoulder? It’s heavy on one side of your body and makes you walk funny. Have you had an argument with someone and then never spoken to them again for years? You have to put on an unhappy face every time that person comes by. That is very difficult.

I felt resentment against my father for over 60 years! He gambled and played poker, which sometimes left our family without grocery money. This went on for a few years until my mother divorced him.

I had a great deal of resentment against him for what he had done to our family. He didn’t keep in contact with my brother and me very often—maybe once a year for a special function or a trip of some kind. He had married a woman with several children. I thought he didn’t have time for us. I didn’t think he loved us. This went on for years.

            I used the word resentment in my short description of my father. The word resentment literally means “to feel again.” I spent 60 years filled with resentment. I kept reliving the past. I felt abandoned. I felt unloved.

Philip Yancey, the renowned Christian author, wrote in his book, What’s So Amazing About Grace?: “Not to forgive imprisons me in the past and locks out all potential for change. I thus yield to another, my enemy, and doom myself to suffer the consequences of the wrong.” 1 He then goes on to quote Lewis Smedes, who has written extensively on forgiveness and interpersonal relationships: “When we genuinely forgive, we set a prisoner free and then discover that the prisoner we set free was us.”2

My father was not my enemy. I should have put the word father in the quote. He was my father, and I desperately wanted his love. I needed a father like the other kids had. My heart ached when my friends told me about their fishing trips with their dads or about their dads taking them camping.

My resentment grew to a point where I didn’t care if I ever saw my father again. I hurt even more when I saw him with his stepchildren, joking and laughing with them.

Then the worst happened. My father had a massive stroke. He lay on his bedroom floor for several days without help. Finally a concerned neighbor called 911. Someone called me and I rushed to the hospital, arriving just as the ambulance got there. My father was awake and coherent. He was aware that I was there as they ran various tests. He seemed upbeat and even smiled. I began to feel saddened by his demeanor. This was a man I had spent 60 years resenting, and he was trying to make me smile!

They moved him up to a room and I spent many hours by his side. He lived about a week longer. In those few short days, we drew extremely close. I held his hand as we talked about the past. When I’d return after a short break, my father would hold his hand up, waiting for me to come back and hold it. He seemed to know he wasn’t going to make it.

He wasn’t supposed to have any water because the nurse said that people his age (he was 86) get pneumonia very easily, and the water might fill up his lungs. He begged me for water. I knew he didn’t have much time left. I went ahead and gave him some ice to wet his lips. He smiled a very big smile and called me his water boy. He told all of his visitors the same thing: “This is my water boy.” My father was a sports fanatic. To use the term water boy was a gesture of affection.

My heart nearly broke. I was his water boy. I can’t tell you how wonderful those words sounded to me! He was not always the most tender in his words of love, but to call me his water boy was his way (at least to me) of saying I was special to him, and that he loved me.

I wanted to talk to my father about Jesus—to tell Him how he could have eternal life. I went out in the hall and prayed for God to give me the words to say. When I opened my eyes after I prayed, I turned to my right, and walking down the hall was the pastor of my church! I couldn’t believe it. How could that be? He was at the hospital at the right time, on the right floor, and coming down the hall just as I prayed for help? Was this just a coincidence?

Of course it wasn’t. God sent him, and he went in and asked my father some questions. My father assured him that he had accepted Jesus as his personal savior. My father died two days later.

I was very saddened by his leaving. It is all right to grieve for your loved ones, but if you know they are Christians you have tremendous comfort. You know you will see them again one day.

Yes, I totally forgave my father that night when I heard that he had accepted God’s gift of eternal life. I probably would have forgiven him eventually, but knowing he was a believer made it so much easier to forgive him right then and there. I tossed out my resentment like yesterday’s lunch, and we had a wonderful time the last two days of his life.

Now my resentment is that I wasted 60 years of love and understanding of my father that I could have shared with him. If I could have taken the first step and overlooked my resentment for my father, I could have spent many years as his water boy.

As Christians, we have the comfort of knowing that we have eternal life. My father had that comfort once he accepted Christ. Death comes to all of us. (See Romans 5:12.) We have to go through the process all living things must go through. However, we can be assured that we will have new bodies and be in heaven with God at the end of that process. Being with God, and having new bodies at the same time. Can’t have anything better than that on this earth—or in heaven!

 

He who loves a quarrel loves sin;

he who builds a high gate [around himself] invites destruction.

Proverbs 17:19

 

Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?

The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law.

1 Corinthians15:55-56

 

Further Adventures

When you have a loved one die who is a Christian know that they are waiting for you in heaven. My father is there, and when I go to meet him, we will have eternity to catch up on all the years we lost here on earth. I see pictures of him golfing and fishing. I love to do both. Maybe there will be a special golf course in heaven that we can play on forever.

I had played with my dad on a couple occasions. He was a wonderful golfer. He had three holes in one over his lifetime. He can teach me all the good things about how to hit the ball and putt when I see him in heaven. When I play now, I will remember him telling me to concentrate on what the goal is (hitting the ball) and to keep my head down.

You and I do that all the time. It is called praying

 

Something to Ponder

Wouldn’t it be nice if whenever we mess up our life we could simply press “Ctrl Alt Delete” and start over?

Remember:

You are never alone.

You are never forsaken.

You are never unloved.

Above all….never, ever, give up!

 

 

 

 

 

Ab Lincoln Given Cookies in the Oval Office by a Stranger.

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Here is a real teaser…There will be a huge announcement about our bookstore in about two weeks. That’s all folks!

___________________________________________________________

I have another excerpt from the book, “Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World.” 

This book reaches out to those who may be suffering from anxiety, fear, depression, addictions, self-doubt, hopelessness, and the many other usual suspects.

This excerpt talks about giving is better than receiving. I talk about actual people who gave, and didn’t expect anything in return.

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Chapter 67

 

It Is Better to Give than Receive

 

A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you,

so you must love one another.

By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.

John13:34-35

 

Imagine what a heavy schedule of appointments President Abraham Lincoln had to keep day after day. Yet when an elderly woman with no official business in mind asked to see him, he graciously consented.

As she enteredLincoln’s office, he rose to greet her and asked how he might be of service. She replied that she had not come to ask a favor. She had heard that the president liked a certain kind of cookie, so she had baked some for him and brought them to his office.

With tears in his eyes,Lincolnresponded, “You are the very first person who has ever come into my office asking not, expecting not, but rather bringing me a gift. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.”

My personal dictionary calls this elderly lady a silent hero—someone who does many things for others and never expect anything in return. My Aunt Dollie was the same kind of person. Her goal in life was to make sure her family was well cared for. And she wanted to be sure she had something to leave her children when she passed on. She did just that. She gave a lot of love to her children and many others, and when she passed on she left her family financially secure. But, more importantly, she left them with memories of a woman who stood out as a person who led by example, relied on tough love to mold her family and became a silent hero to many that knew her.

This type of person is high on the Lord’s priority list of how His followers should act. This type of unselfish love is the cornerstone of what the Bible teaches about love.

My brother Dave is a silent hero to me. I didn’t know for over 40 years that he had done something for me that changed my life because he wasn’t out to impress anyone with his love for his family.

When my brother was a senior in high school he told our mother he wasn’t going to go to college because our family couldn’t afford two people going to college at once. He said he would support me and help me make it through so that one of the members of the family could get a degree. Well, it took a long time because of the military and three children, but I got that degree and went into teaching.

I didn’t know about his sacrifice until over 40 years later when my mother told me. That, my friends, is a true silent hero! My brother gave up his chance for a college degree so I could get mine. I will never be able to thank him enough for what he did, but he knows now that my love for him has grown deeper than seems possible between two brothers. I also have become a silent hero in his back pocket to make sure that he knows how much I appreciate what he did for me.

John13:34-35 says that we should love one another as He loves us. We can always think of what the Lord would do to help them and use that as a model for the help we give. Remember His unconditional love, and how He would do anything He could to comfort them and help them through any crisis or stressful situation. That is what silent heroes do.

 

The greatest among you will be your servant. For whoever exalts himself will be humbled,

and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.

Mathew23:11-12

 

“Real generosity is doing something nice for someone who will never find out”

—Frank A. Clark

 

Further Adventures

Look around you and list those you feel are your silent heroes. You don’t need to share your findings with them. Just know that they are there, and be happy knowing that they will always be there for you.

 

Something to Ponder

Isn’t it funny how he who gives to the poor will lack nothing, but he who closes his eyes to them receives many curses?

 

If You Think You Are Perfect, Try Walking on Water.

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There will be a huge and exciting announcement about our bookstore in about three weeks. Why am I telling you so far ahead of time? (You will have to wait to even find that out!)

For now we have one book in the store that is a must read for those you know that may be suffering from anxiety, fear, depression, addictions, self-doubt, hopelessness, and the many other usual suspects.

The book is called, “Signs of Hope: Ways to survive in an Unfriendly World.” Check it out, but clicking on the “Bookstore,” tab at the top of this page.

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I have an excerpt from the book, “Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in an Unfriendly World.” The topic is about fear, one of the afflictions I mentioned above.

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Chapter 66

 

If You Think You’re Perfect, Try Walking on Water

 

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;

and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you.

Isaiah 43:2

 

While visitingHawaii, a group of us decided to go snorkeling. (You need to know that I am not a very good swimmer and even use a floatation device to help me stay on top of the water.) We got to the bay where we were planning to snorkel and proceeded to put on our gear; then we went to the edge of the water, put on our flippers and goggles; and slid down into the water from some rocky ledges. I was enjoying the beautiful fish and even saw a sea turtle! I was a little way out from the rocky ledge when I realized I hadn’t put on my floatation device! I was having a close encounter with God!

I tried to relax so I could still look at the fish below me, but the water was 40 feet deep where I was! I felt I needed to head for the rocks and get out in order to be on the safe side. I started kicking and headed for the shore when I got a huge cramp in my left leg. It was so bad I couldn’t kick with that leg anymore!

I struggled to stay on top of the water. But the people on the shore didn’t seem to be worried; in fact, I don’t think they even noticed me. I was scrambling to get up on the rocks—and they just kept on walking! The waves beat me against the rocks, which were cutting up my knees. I was washed out a couple more times before I finally got a grip on the rocks and pulled myself out of the water. I was exhausted, and in just a couple more minutes I would have drowned. I had been left alone, and I really felt I was going to drown. I had made the mistake of not having a floatation device with me. I would have been fine had I put it on.

I consider that similar to thinking I can make it on my own without God. When we try to live without God, we eventually find ourselves thrashing in the water of life and getting pretty banged up.

We may have friends who are going through trials. They think that they are well off—doing OK—almost to the point they think they can walk on water. Or like a duck, they may look serene floating on the surface, but underneath, they’re paddling furiously. They may actually be struggling to keep above water and have many things dragging them down.

We need to check on them from time to time to see how they’re doing and look for signals that will let us know when they’re in trouble. They need our reassurance that the Lord will help them through troubled times. We can pray with them and let them know we’re there when they need us. That will be very comforting for them. They’ll know they won’t be out in the deep water with no one to help them climb the slippery rocks to safety.

Think of how strong Peter was in his faith, and yet when Jesus told him to walk on water, he got very fearful and started to sink. We probably have less faith than Peter did, so we must hold on to Jesus and let Him keep us on top of the water.

 

Have no fear of sudden disaster or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked;

 for the Lord will be your confidence.

Proverbs3:25-26

 

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Isaiah 41:10

 

Further Adventures

  1. Call several of your closest friends, and just check in with them. You can probably sense what’s going on with them by the tone of their voice, or they may just go right to the problem and let you know without your asking. Help them know that you are there for them, and remind them that the Lord is with them always.
  2. Check your own family members and make sure they are on the right path of good health—physically, emotionally and spiritually. They aren’t always going to run to you with their problems. When I was a teacher, I lost a couple of students to suicide and the parents didn’t even know their child was depressed. Make contact with your family daily, and make sure they are in the right frame of mind.

 

Something to Ponder

Isn’t it funny how we sometimes test the depth of water with both feet and sink?